ASK DAVID & ROZ
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This is turning out to be quite fun!
You keep sending questions and we'll keep answering them for you!
Here's a little background information for you on our two advisors.
David is an attractive bachelor, restaurateur, active, athletic, 55 and very wise in the way of the dating world.
Roz, a widow of a certain age, a business woman, racehorse owner and breeder who is well-traveled, interested and interesting is also here to give you a hand.
They will be your sounding board.
Use the form at the bottom of the page to email us whatever you want their opinions on.
So start now and let us hear from you!
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Dear David and Roz,
"I am a single, energetic European woman in my early fifties and enjoy a healthy, loving relationship with a man who is 10 years older. Sometimes he pressures me to getting married and I keep trying to explain to him that the relationship is terrific as it is. Sometimes he tells me that when he asks for marriage I should be ready because I will only get one chance. Do you think I will lose him if I say no!"
- C OF NY
ROZ SAYS:
Dear C of NY: I say you should say "Yes" --- and fast! If he's a good guy and as you put it its a healthy loving relationship you are a lucky woman and should thank your lucky stars this good guy came into your life. There are a lot of women out there looking and if you keep putting him off somebody else will come along happy to get him, and he'll be gone. Don't make a mistake and let him slip through your fingers. You could be very very sorry. I say let's hear wedding bells!
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DAVID SAYS:
What are you really feeling? I can see both sides. I am a bachelor probably because I am spoiled and idealistic. I have had several great loves and I remain romantically optimistic. So I agree love doesn't always have to be sanctioned by the state. I also understand that the act of making a spiritual commitment to each other in front of your friends and family may be the confirmation he is seeking unless he is looking for a caretaker. If it is not the later, why not immerse yourself in the idea and unleash all it's powers? Of course, if you have had your fill of legal arrangements or are not quite sure then perhaps you should be honest with him and yourself.
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Dear David and Roz,
"I'm in my 60's. You'd think I'd know by now what I am, but I don't. I'm a grandfather several times over, two wives, divorced. Problem is I've had men in my life too, and now I have this wonderful woman I want to stay with me. I'm afraid if she finds out about my past she'll drop me like a hot potato- and I haven't exactly been discreet. I try to keep it out of my mind, but it keeps popping up in there because I know it's all going to come out, and I'm not sure I won't waver again. Do you think I need professional help? I don't know what to do."
- LOST AND CONFUSED
ROZ SAYS:
Dear Lost: Professional help I think is your answer here. With it you just might be able to pull yourself together and make something of this budding relationship with the woman you seem to have high regard for. You obviously want to or this wouldn't have crossed your mind. Recognizing your conflict is the beginning of being able to pull off a successful outcome. Good luck to you.
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DAVID SAYS:
Make it your New Year's resolution - be honest otherwise what possible foundation could you have for a meaningful relationship. Perhaps you are a dreamer, intoxicated with the possibilities of this woman or a lonely human being just trying to be loved and understood? What ever, stand up and be counted and be honest with her. It is not fair to do anything else. You have had many opportunities in your lifetime to know who you are and I believe I would be irate if I was she and you didn't come clean. As far as professional help, if you like but this is not about therapy it is about your backbone and the truth. Tell her and let her decide. If you believe in reincarnation, then be optimistic and in the "here and now" your fate is cast so be brave maybe she has been waiting all her life for a man like you.
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