Dating Advice: ASK DAVID & ROZ
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Welcome to dating advice from David & Roz.
We've been writing this dating advice column for a while now and we're getting great feedback about how its helping people.
So keep those dating questions coming and we'll keep giving you the advice you need to succeed in love.
Who are we?
Well David is an attractive bachelor, restaurateur, active, athletic, 55 and very wise in the way of the dating world.
Roz, a widow of a certain age, a business woman, racehorse owner and breeder who is well-traveled, interested and interesting is also here to give you a hand.
Collectively we've been dating for over 100 years!
We will answer any dating question you have, so send it in.
Use the form at the bottom of the page to email us whatever you have on your mind.
So withoput further ado, here are the latest and greatest of the questions we've received.
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Dear David and Roz,
"I am a recent Anglo widow of 6 months. I met a Hispanic man I fell for. We want to be a couple. He is married but separated. His wife won't give him a divorce. She doesn't want to live with him anymore, but is being controlling. My two sons, of upper 40s in age, are very upset with me, and have threatened not to ever talk to me again. They say I am being disrespectful to their dad and being trashy. I can't remarry anyway, because of social security. I would lose the little I am getting. My income is not large. I really enjoy this man, and we want to travel, and enjoy life. He has money on his own, and is not a moocher or freeloader. What should I do?"
- Sallie R. Eastman
ROZ SAYS:
Dear Sallie E:
I think the way to handle this is to explain to this man that you really want to be with him but that you must take into consideration your two sons concern since it’s so soon after your husband passed away and that its important to you that he gets to know your sons so that as time goes by they will see how wonderful he is and has only your best interests at heart and then will give their blessing to the two of you to go off into the sunset together, traveling and enjoying life wherever it takes you. If he's the man for you he will agree to go slow and have a good foundation for your future together. Good luck.
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DAVID SAYS:
Dear Sallie E,
I certainly understand your sons’ alarm especially, with your husband’s recent departure. It seems you have some dysfunctional aspects of both families making this uncomfortable all around. Some housekeeping is required so first I would ask him to settle his own domestic affairs and do not bring the pressures into your fledgling relationship the same as you should remove your interest in his personal affairs. Next I would explain your feelings to your family as you start to maintain a lower profile until things sort themselves out. Now enjoy the time you can spend together away from the pressures of both families learning new tango & the mambo while strengthening & testing the foundations of your relationship.
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Dear David and Roz,
"I have a dilemma I hope you can help me with. I have been working in a job for many years and over the years have been friendly with a lady in the same department. We often have lunch together and sometimes a dinner if we're working late. She knew my wife who died a few years ago and I knew her husband who divorced her. He ran off with a younger woman and I knew she went through a really hard time with that. We’re both in our late 50's. Here's my problem - I’ve been offered a job in another town I'm thinking of taking. It will mean a lot more money to me. My children are grown and live apart, so I can do this. Suddenly I feel I wouldn't want to leave this lady behind. I don't know if I should propose to her to come with me. We’ve never been more than just good friends but somehow I think she'd do it. Its a little scary for me. I hadn't thought of any of this till the job offer came up. I'm afraid of making the wrong move. What do I do?"
- Scared
ROZ SAYS:
Dear Scared:
Only you know what’s in your heart deep down. Obviously you and this lady get along and until you were faced with losing the relationship it didn't occur to you that your feelings for her could be more than just friends. So I say jump in, make the move, take the job and start your new life. It may well be the best thing that's happened to you in a long time. Hopefully if you ask her and she says “yes” I'm sure it will work out just right for both of you since you have the basis of real friendship to go on. You may find that she feels exactly the same way you do and will be thrilled with your proposal and the thought of the wonderful possibilities that could lie ahead for the two of you. I’m betting on it!
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DAVID SAYS:
Dear Scared,
What a wonderful opportunity for both of you. Once you share your enthusiasm for a new start, a new challenge and a chance for a new partner I am sure she will be waiting for the invite. Ask her to visit the new area with you and get her feedback on all aspects of the move. Whether she moves in with you right away or you carry on a long distance correspondence, chances are there is romance in your future. Just stop to enjoy all the sights and little joys along the way. Good for you!
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